Episode 39: I like Me. A Conversation About Confidence
Feeling confident, beautiful, sexy, and just all around good is such an amazing feeling- and one that unfortunately as women….we don’t allow ourselves to feel as often as we should. It’s all too easy to stand in front of a mirror and pick apart our perceived flaws but how often to we stand there in awe of our own beauty.
Um..never?!?
Remember that scene in Mean Girls when they all go over to Regina Georges house and stand in front of her mirror and start to complain. My hips are huge, I hate my calves, I have man shoulders….my nail beds suck. I mean, it was funny and hit a nerve because it’s true.
The other day I caught my 8 year old brushing her hair in the mirror and she set down the brush, smiled at her self, and said OUT LOUD. I’m so pretty.
I was floored and I wished that she would look at herself always with that same smile and always believe that about herself. I’m not sure the age at which I lost that or when any of us lose that…..but somewhere along our lives we became more self conscious. It wasn’t enough to think nice things about ourselves, but we became so obsessed and dependent about what other people thought about us. Do they think I’m pretty? Am I as pretty as so and so, am I good enough? At some point we gave away our own power and traded it in for validation, praise, and acceptance from others.
Over the past few years I have really been on a journey to love myself more….and yeah…..it’s been a journey. A two steps forward, 5 steps back, 3 steps forward…you get the point. But the other day I caught myself looking in the mirror and I thought dang…I am really beautiful. That thought kind of caught me a little by surprise because it’s definitely not the normal. Right, I mean, only self absorbed, super concieted people would think or (gasp) say that out loud about themselves. But holy freaking cow…..it feels SO GOOD to freaking like yourself! Like really, really good.
I’ve been paying attention to this feeling more and more and taking notice of the days and the weeks that I feel really good and it’s made me think two things. Number one: I love feeling this way and number two: I want EVERYONE to feel this way. I mean, imagine the kind of world we could live in if we all liked or even loved ourselves! We could stop spending so much time complaining or wishing or comparing and actually do some pretty flipping amazing things in the world.
So….how did I get to this point, and how can you get there too. I’ve thought and meditated, and talked it out the Conor and friends and I came up with 4 things that really made a difference for me. One or all of these might be a useful tool for you so here ya go:
Mindset and positive self talk. I’ve said it 100 times and I’ll say it 10,000 times more. Change starts in your head. The way you talk to yourself matters.
Get dressed every day. Hello, I used to LIVE in workout clothes and a top bun and day old makeup. But when I made the decision to SHOW up for my days- it made SUCH a huge difference in my confidence level!
Get out of your comfort zone- The more often you can push yourself to do something out of your normal, the more chances you get to prove to yourself just how flipping awesome you really are.
Accept compliments. Oh this old thing….downplay. Or we think we need to compliment back… Learn to say THANK YOU! I have worked HARD on this one. It felt sooooo uncomfortable at first
Okay- now obviously there are probably a million other things you can do to boost your confidence and fall more in love with yourself, but this is a starting point. Just pick ONE of these things to work on and see how it starts to ever so slightly start working on changing the way you see yourself.
Links and other helpful things:
Boost your confidence like crazy when you join the
DITCH MY COMFORT ZONE
summer challenge!
Episode with Brittany Crane from Get Out There Girl
Join the Positively You Community on Facebook
Let’s be Insta Friends!