152: Sex Talks: 5 Conversations to Transform Your Love Life {Insights From Our Positively You Book Club}
We just wrapped up this month of The Positively You Book Club, a personal growth book club where we focus on a different area of our life each month. Our focus for February was on relationships, sex, and connection- so the book Sex Talks by Vanessa Marin was the perfect BOTM.
Our conversation inside our virtual meeting was absolutely incredible. A huge thanks to the amazing women who joined in on reading the book, who DM’d me messages, replied to emails, and of course who showed up on Zoom in our live book club with their insights after reading Sex Talks.
Because I know not everyone was able to make it, we made sure to hit record so you too can get in on the conversation (almost like you were there!) So without any more delay, here is the the book club. You're in for a real treat as we dive into "Sex Talks" by Vanessa Marin
Enjoy!
Prioritize Intimacy
You know, sometimes we forget just how important intimacy is in our relationships. It's not just about physical connection; it's about emotional closeness too. So, let's make sure we're embracing vulnerability and having those open, heart-to-heart talks with our partners.
Communication is Key
Steffanie (a book club member) really brought it home how important ongoing communication around sex really is. Whether it's talking about desires, navigating conflicts, or just scheduling some quality time together, its key to keep coming back to the converstation.
Initiation Styles
Ever thought about the different ways you and your partner initiate intimacy? It's fascinating! Take some time to explore and understand each other's preferences—it could lead to some exciting discoveries. The book, Sex Talks, shared 6 different initiation styles. Here they are but you’re gonna have to get the book to get the full scope!
Excite me
Take care of me
Play with me
Desire me
Connect with me
Touch me
Spontaneous Scheduling
Yes I get that those words create an oxymoron, but who says scheduling sex can't be fun? I coined the term spontaneous scheduling as a way to keep things exciting. Instead of thinking of scheduling sex like another thing on your to-do list, think of it like extending an invitation to connect, but with a sprinkle of spontaneity.
Example: Send a text that says “thinking about you today, can’t wait to rip your clothes off later and have some fun. Meet me in the bedroom at 9:30”
Spontaneous: ☑️
Scheduled: ☑️
See? It can be done!
Rituals and Connection
This was one of my favorite takeaways from the book. Creating rituals as a couple. Rituals aren't just for special occasions; they're for everyday moments too. Whether it's a nightly walk, a bedtime routine, or simply stealing kisses whenever you leave the house, these rituals strengthen the bond between you and your partner.
Yes, No, Maybe List
Ah, the infamous Yes, No, Maybe list. It's not just about exploring your sexual preferences and boundaries; it's about sparking deeper conversations and diving into new experiences together.
Embrace Vulnerability and Awkwardness
Let's face it—awkwardness is inevitable, especially when it comes to intimacy. But hey, it's all part of the journey! Embrace those awkward moments, try new things, and watch your relationship grow. I loved the quote from the book:
“Awkwardness is the price of admission for a smoking hot sex life”
I loved book club this month and I am looking forward to next month’s book and discussion.
Make sure you join our Book Club and get on the email list so you don’t miss important updates, links, and invitations!
Next Steps
Join our personal growth book club- it’s completely free!
You’ll grow, connect, make new friends, gain new insights and perspective and so much more!
Connect with me on Instagram- it’s where all the fun really is
Loved this episode? Share is with a friend
OTHER EPISODES YOU’LL LOVE:
* 150: Simple Steps to Prioritize Your Marriage Everyday